Eric Johnson, eric@ultramaxsports.com, 417-890-7200
To save you time with the inevitable, “is this race for me?” questions we always get, please see below…
You might get offended in this race if you are any of the following:
- a Republican
- a Democrat
- a Whig
- a star of an 80′s sitcom
- a scientologist
- a Wiccan
- an atheist
- a Christian
- a Caucasian
- a former professional wrestler
- a nice guy
- a jerk
- a running store owner
- an attractive man/woman
- a hermaphrodite
- a late bloomer
- someone with lots of acne
- a pop star
- a 70′s love balladeer
- art garfinkel.
This race is for you if:
- you like silly humor
- you are kind if immature
- you watched lots of tv as a kid instead of reading books
- you like scavenger hunts
- you are bored with just doing 5K’s
- you are intimidated by 5K’s but a scavenger hunt sounds cool
- you didn’t “develop” until you were a junior in high school
- your kids are stressing you out
- you are just curious that someone would put this much time into such nonsense that you have to see what the fuss is all about.
